


Lost Promises

by Batdad (MizGoat), DivineValley



Series: Quartermaster and The Speck [1]
Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Gen, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Minor Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-17
Updated: 2018-02-17
Packaged: 2019-03-19 15:54:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13707714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MizGoat/pseuds/Batdad, https://archiveofourown.org/users/DivineValley/pseuds/DivineValley
Summary: Steady went looking for a fight, but ended up with a friend. Of course nothing is certain in the GAR.





	1. Chapter 1

Sitting on a bench in the 212th’s locker room Joy had just finished a brief workout, exercise that wasn’t accompanied by gunfire really helped him unwind after missions. Rubbing a towel through his still damp hair he barely looked up when he heard footsteps, it wasn’t until he knew someone was standing over him he peeked out from under the scratchy cloth.

He didn’t know this vod, didn’t recognize the tattoos or hair style, this was someone new and his whole posture screamed fight...but something else to. Something sad, defeated too.

“Hi there! You need help?” Joy realized he may have been a little too enthusiastic when the other jumped. He seemed deterred for a moment but he remained in his spot staring down at him.

“Why...bother loving someone? You’re just going to lose him?”

He’s heard that statement before, a hundred times over but usually it came from taunting accompanied by a sneer. This trooper seemed to be trying to provoke him, Joy’s gained a reputation for having a short temper when it came to Sunshine and his dream, wasn’t his fault everyone sucked.

"Life is short and I want to see the best of it. Having dreams, goals someone I love with all my being, it's not a weakness. It's my greatest strength. He's given me everything, his trust, his love, his heart and soul. Even if I don't see the end I want him too and no jaded, pessimistic assholes are going to convince me otherwise!" He said bluntly keeping his voice light and cheerful.

“I get that. It’s just not exactly in our hands. I don’t know...”

Nothing was in their hands, truly nothing but who he can give his love to, Joy was in complete control over that. He found it in Sunshine, he treasured that love and he wasn’t going to lose it, not without a fight.

"Then take it in your hands. You're alive, you're a living breathing person, we all are...I know everyone says I'm crazy or deficient. Maybe I am...but I'm going to hold onto this. To him, to my dreams. Maybe one day you'll find your own dream. Maybe one day you'll find someone who you wish to protect with all your being. Don't deny yourself a little bit of happiness. Think about it, okay?"

“The person I wanted to hold onto spilt his guts into the dirt while I held him, and there wasn’t a damn thing I could do. I don’t want to bring you down. I just don’t see it the way you do.”

Oh, that’s...awful. He couldn’t begin to imagine. Sunshine’s bloody limp body in his arms, glassed over eyes looking at nothing.

"...I'm sorry for your loss but you never know what the future will bring.” Joy whispered hoping the other knew he was genuine with his condolences.

“Who knows what'll happen tomorrow or a week or a month. You don't have to close yourself off from others. But who am I to lecture, right? I can't tell you how to live your life, you can't tell me how to live mine. Maybe I'm just a crazy kriffing optimist? Probably am, right?"

“Probably. And my point was never that you shouldn’t want things, just that tomorrow can be an awful long way off. Don’t... don’t pin happiness on that. If today is all you get, make sure it’s worth it.”

He was honest and to the point, Joy liked this guy.

"Oh, I know that but dreaming of a tomorrow...It seems pretty good to me. So you have a name? Can't keep going by a number, we do names here not numbers, that's my new slogan for the 212th!"

“It’s... Steady. The guys call me Steady.”

Like steady hands, he’d have to make a joke during a better time.

“Steady well it’s nice to meet you Steady! I’m Joy, see now we properly know each other! So if anyone gives you an issue or anything you tell me. I’ll make sure to shut them up good.” Joy promised with a wide smile as he pumped his fist in the air.

“I can just shut them up myself. But I appreciate the offer.” He could see a tiny smile on his face, that was a good sign, he always liked it when others smiled. There never seemed to be enough of those in the GAR.

“Heh, well if you ever need back up! Seems like a lot of people are scared of me and I have no idea why.” He knew why but it was always fun to play innocent, especially when he knew they were scared of him.

“Couldn’t say. Couldn’t say.” Was that an almost playful tone?

Snorting to himself Joy knew for sure he was going to like this guy, they’d make for good friends if Steady was open to the idea.

“Joy?”

Hearing Sunshine call out to him, Joy looked over his shoulder feeling everything just brighten. There was a reason he started to call him Sunshine. “Sun! Hey c’mere and meet my new friend Steady!”

“You can’t force people to be your friend against their wills Joy.”

Pouting a bit Joy did his best not to make a comment. Worked on you pretty well.

“It’s not against his will! We were having a nice talk!”

“We’re good. But I’m due on duty in 10. It’s been nice. Thanks.”

Watching as Steady started to walk toward the exit Joy stood up calling out to him before he was gone. “Let’s talk again Stead’ika!” He shouted and laughed at the flustered look that appeared on his face. He didn’t like it when his brothers were sad and lonely so he’d do all he can to make as many happy as he can.


	2. Chapter 2

Steady hated being in medical. He hated the way it smelled of blood an antiseptic. He hated the way it sounded, full of beeping machines and the hushed conversations of medics. He hated the way his armor made obnoxious clacking noises on the too small hard plastic chairs they gave you to sit on. Mostly though he hated that he only ever seemed to be here if he or someone he cared about was in pain.

Joy was… Joy was a mess. But he was awake. Steady still would still have been here if he was unconscious, but now he had to figure out how to hold a conversation with a dying man. In the next bed over Sunshine’s chest was slowly heaving in and out, but that was the only sign that he was still among the living.

“He’s...he’s been out cold since the crash. Head was hit bad and his arm was just dangling there. Well I guess I’m not in a better state. Guess you can say I’m all Left...maybe that wasn’t in good taste.” Joy seemed a little subdued from his normal impassioned self, but knowing how many drugs had to have been pumped into him, Steady was impressed that he was even making sense.

“It’s your body. I think you get to make that call.” Steady spread his hands and looked at them as if he expected to see an answer written on the palms of his gloves.

“Yeah...looks like I’m not getting that fizzy drink and beach house. That’s a bummer...Steady I...I need to ask a favor.”

“What do you need? If it’s in my power it’s yours” Steady straightened up in his seat. Please, he thought, please give me something to do that isn’t sitting about and waiting for you to die.

“I’m going to...I’m going to ask they give Sunshine my arm. I heard rumors they do that. They recycle us. I can save him. I can save him so...so if he does survive that and he comes back can you please, can you please look out for him? I don’t want him to be alone. Can you...can you be there for him? Please?” Steady realized that Joy had twisted his fist into the sheets, and moved to cover it with his own. He started working his thumb into little soothing circles over Joy’s knuckles.

“Of course. Sure. Consider it done. Is there anything else I can do for you? Now I mean? I don’t know if I can make it fiz, but I can probably get some hooch if you want it.”

“Haha nah I rather not be drunk before the end. I’m going to look death in the face and smile. More my drift...sucks I...had so many ideas. Fun ideas for all of us. How this place could feel almost like a home. Man it really sucks. If I ever get reborn I definitely better be by an ocean with white beaches!...I...I don’t want to leave him alone. I don’t want him to be alone. He was always alone as a cadet, I guess it’s why I wanted to be closer to him. Make him smile and laugh. He doesn’t act it but he cares so much and his heart is so fucking big. I don’t want him to be alone.” The desperation of Joy’s words made Steady’s breath catch in his throat and it was a moment before he could speak.

“If I have any say in it he won’t be. I promise,” he said and hoped that none of the doubts he had about the chances of him ever seeing Sunshine again showed on his face.

"Th-thanks...uhm hey so under my bunk I have a stash of those candies, those spicy ones. I want you to have 'em. You can even have my pillow too it was actually really soft, y'know me and Sun we'd used to go around sneaking to see if guys who were transferred left any goodies behind. Like we were pirates pillaging for treasure. It was fun..."

“Thanks. I’ll... thanks.” He’d had the unpleasant job of figuring out what to do with the personal items of dead troopers on his squad before, but having something bequeathed to him was new. It felt intimate in a way he wasn’t quite prepared for.

"Steady, thanks for being...my friend. You put up with me, not many do that, entertain my ideas listen to me ramble on, you did. You're a good brother. So did you ever find a dream?"

“If I make it out of the war alive? Sure. I’m going to settle down somewhere with good restaurants, get fat, maybe pick up a job as an accountant, never make a decision that might get someone killed again. Maybe I’ll get a pet lothcat.” He had been making up most of it on the spot. The only thing he was certain he wanted after the war was a long nap.

"That's a pretty good dream. Hold onto it because even if it doesn't come true...at least it was yours." Joy smiled, and if it wasn’t as radiant as Steady was used to, it was no less beautiful.

“All right. I will. And if we get a second go around, maybe I’ll see you on that beach.”

"Heh yeah...let's meet on that beach, all of us. I always wanted to see a proper ocean...just look out across it and wonder what's on the other side. Looks like my time is up...I don't wanna say goodbye so...how bout see you later?"

“Alright then. I’ll see you then.”

Steady stayed and watched as Joy and Sunshine’s beds were wheeled away, and only stood up once he lost sight of them around a corner. Then he stood up and went back to his office because the only thing he could do for either of them now was try and keep as many of the rest of their brothers alive as he could.


End file.
